Something I Had To Experience Alone

I decided to go on a retreat to give myself my own healing. I stayed in Assumption Sabbath Place Bagiuo City from March 20 to 22, 2012

I never travel alone. Whenever I travel, I'm always with friends, colleagues, family or acquaintance. It has to be always fun and adventurous but not this time. This is the very first time that I had to travel alone. It was very significant and memorable. I was alone and I took a bus. When we got to SCTEX, tears started rolling down my face non-stop! I have no idea why. Like what my neurologist said, the heart remembers what the mind forgets. My heart seems to remember every little detail of the accident that happened back in December of 2009. The whole event was completely wiped out of my memory. I acquired Retrograde Amnesia. I don't remember anything about this particular eventful life experience! But tears were non-stop! I suddenly felt very heavy for no reason at all. I don't know why I felt so heavy that I had to cry hard.



This is just some thoughts and prayers I put on paper. I just like writing them down and reading it afterwards.

Day 2 (March 21, 2012)


You are not a martyr to punish yourself. It's not even for the glory of God.

God is good for showing me things I need to see.

I need to love myself more. No more moping! No more wallowing in pain and misery!

I need to be open to people. I will be open to people.

Look forward. Move forward. If you look back, just smile.

After this retreat, I shall go back to Manila happier, lighter. I will accept this experience and learn from it.  Now I am wiser! I am stronger. I can be happier. I WILL MOVE ON!

I will be careful on how my thoughts shape my life. I am in control of my mind. I choose what I think. I choose to be free. I choose to leave everything behind. No more excess baggage. No more negative thoughts! It's not helping me. It's unhealthy. I will love myself more. I love myself and I need to show it. I will rise from all of this a better person. I accept everything. I see it. I learn from it. Thank you for this experience. Thank you life. Lord be with me. I AM MOVING ON!

I WILL KEEP ON MOVING ON!

God is good. Life is good.


Day 3 (March 22, 2012)


I will come out of this place a better person. I am stronger. I am wiser. I have a clean slate. My mind is blank. No more moping. No more thinking of irrational, unhealthy, worthless thoughts. God is giving me the power, the strenght, the grace to start anew. No prejudice. But a wiser woman. God is giving me the grace and the courage to move on happily. I am lighter. I feel lighter. I am free. I feel free.

Thank you Lord for guiding me all the way, for carrying me in times that I need you. I surrender to you my life. I surrender my moping and brooding and my wallowing in pain and misery. I thank you for granting me a happier and healthier spiritual life. I embrace this experience and hope that beautiful things will come my way at your will. Thank you Lord for the grace and beauty of life. Help me to see the beautiful things and accept this experience positively. Help me rise from this fall. Guide me all the way. Send me your Holy Spirit and bless my journey. I will keep on moving on! I have faith in you Lord. Your will be done.

Thank you.

This retreat totally set me free. It helped me accept the unacceptable and move on. God has his ways.