So I spent some time worshipping the Lord for a few minutes and started writing @ 11:32pm. I was busy working on my blackbook for J but it's Sunday and I wanted to devote some time for Father God. I haven't been reading the bible but I want to put it back into my system so I ordered a white bible on Shoppee. Due to the COVID19 Pandemic, shipping had been postponed again and again. I see I haven't been writing here for a long time. Last entry was back in October last year about Angelo. A lot of things has happened including J coming into my life. J had been amazing! He is just someone so familiar. How is it possible that we seem so connected? It's like he's someone who really knows me and I've known him for a very long time. It's just left me in abyss that he just broke up with me and blocked me in FB. Just like that after all our magical moments. I have FAITH in God and I'd like to honor Him amidst this confusion and emptiness of J that I feel. All these still feels positive because of the love of God in me. I trust Him and I know that whatever happened between J and me, actually everything that happened between J and me is all in God's name. His Hands are involved. The universe made its way to connect us both and made everything possible between us in God's name. I never asked for anything about J. Everything was handed to me by God. He made a way for J & I. Thy will be done. Glory is to you oh Lord. Lord God, you know how I committed myself to you. I made vows that I broke but it's still YOU in my heart Lord. I remember the day that I promised I will CONNECT with YOU in ways I know BEST and it is thru TEARS Lord. These TEARS I am crying right now, I lift them all up to You Lord. I'm not asking for anything at all. I just want to HONOR you Lord. You SILENCE all my FEARS. I believe IN YOU. YOU'RE THE GOD of MIRACLES. I honor You Lord. And I lift up this night to you. I set aside the black book for now because I want to Feel Your LOVE again. I want to connect with YOU Lord. Thank YOU. You're the ONLY ONE who knows my heart's TRUE DESIRE. Please don't LET ME GO LORD. Have Mercy on Me! I know that I have sinned. I am not worthy of your presence in my LIFE but I CLING TO YOU LORD. YOU ARE THE ONLY WAY, THE TRUTH & THE LIFE. THANK YOU LORD FOR BEING HERE, RIGHT NOW, IN MY PRESENT. I DON'T DESERVE YOU BUT YOU ARE THE MERCIFUL LORD, MY SAVIOUR. HEAL ME LORD. CALL ME OUT TO REMEMBER YOU EVERY SECOND OF MY LIFE. I BELIEVE IN YOUR MIRACLES. YOUR LOVE WILL SAVE ME LORD. BE MY LIGHT. BE MY GUIDANCE. STAY WITH ME LORD.
March 30, 2020, Monday 12:06am (42min)
TRANSCRIPTION TIME STAMP = 2.20.2022 Sunday 9:12pm
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